Monday, July 1, 2019


(Editor’s Note: At one time I made a point of collecting every new book about female-led, female-dominated and female-supremacist marriages. These days (I’m happy to note) there seem to be too many such to keep track of, let alone afford and read.  The Empress Arises appeared in 2011, co-authored by “Ivy Ann and Bobbi Rigger” and self-published by Lulu. In the text, Ivy Ann is identified as “an important professor of history and women's studies at a certain University that we won’t name” and “Bobbi” as a “stay-at-home househusband.” Alas, the book seems to have vanished from all online sources, along with the obviouisly cybernamed co-authors. All I could unearth was a screen-shot of the Lulu product page preserved by the Wayback Machine (and reproduced below). Fortunately, I did manage to squirrel away a few excerpts from the book’s opening chapters, excerpts that provide some provocative details about the female ascendant couple’s courtship, marriage and domestic lifestyle. I will, of course, promptly “unpublish” these copyrighted excerpts upon request from the Riggers or their representatives (I would dearly love to be contacted!). On the other hand, if there is no such request but sufficient interest from blog readers, I may decide to share additional excerpts from The Empress Arises.—Thomas Lavalle)


A Typical Day at the Rigger House
(From The Empress Arises by Ivy Ann and Bobbi Rigger)

From the outside, our marriage would seem pretty conventional.

Oh, there are a few things that may excite the interest of our neighbors in the little suburb where we live. For instance, it is Ivy Ann Rigger who goes out to work every morning and Robert is a stay-at-home househusband. But that's not nearly as unusual as it once was. In fact, it is getting more common every day~

But, on the inside, things are very different.

To explain, let’s walk through a normal day in our lives.

It's a warm spring Wednesday morning at our house. At five-thirty, Robert (Bobbi) gets up while Ivy stays in bed for a few more minutes snooze. So far, nothing's unusual about our routine. After all, lots of husbands get up before their wives. But if someone were to peak through the windows, she might be startled to see that Bobbi is wearing only a long, light pajama top without pants.

Still, maybe you could explain that by the fact that it is warm at the moment And, actually, if it were the middle of winter, we'd see that Bobbi was more conventionally dressed for the cold. But right now, he gets up and his knees and legs are bare. He slips on a light robe and heads for the kitchen.

There he checks to make sure everything is ready. The coffee is brewing. Breakfast fixings are ready. Ivy likes a single poached egg in the morning and a slice of toast. It’ll be ready when she comes to the table.

He made her lunch the night before but now he checks to make certain it is prepared properly. She likes to take a sandwich rather than eat out for her lunches. It gives her more time to work at her desk.

Then Bobbi checks the time. He still has a few minutes. So, he sits down at the kitchen table for a preparatory cup of coffee before the day. It is then that our observer, peaking through the window, might see another odd thing. When he sits, Bobbi pulls the tail of his robe and shirt to one side and places his flesh against the cold plastic of the kitchen chair. Maybe, if our spy had seen The Story of O, it might remind her of the scene when O does the same with her dress.

And if our spy was really looking, or had a pair of binoculars, she might notice something really odd. On Bobbi's left buttock there is a small tattoo. It reads “IAR.”

At ten till six, Bobbi gets busy. He stands and begins boiling the egg. He also pours a cup of coffee and takes it to Ivy Ann where she is just now waking up. He speaks softly, "It’s almost six, Lady mine.” She stirs and slowly sits up in the bed. He gives her the coffee. She takes it and mumbles, "Christ…”

He smiles and heads back to the kitchen. Again, there's nothing new or unusual here. Lots of husbands bring their wives coffee in the morning. Even very masculine, very commanding ones do. It’s chivalrous. Nor is there anything too odd about what happens next. He sets the table and waits until he hears the shower go on. Then he starts boiling the egg.

When she comes dressed to the table a few minutes later, everything is set. The egg waits for her, as does a glass of fresh orange juice. She sits and he pours her coffee. She thanks him. He stands attentively. She sips the juice and, after a second, nods. He slides into the chair across from her.

Some mornings, when she is still sleepy, they are silent. This morning, though, she is awake and energetic. “We’ll finally be hiring a European specialist today,” she tells him. He smiles and sits quietly, only speaking when she speaks to him, or when he feels that a well-formed question or comment will show he is paying attention. "That’s so interesting...” or “I'm sure you're right…”

She may also give a few quick instructions for the day. “Remember to put those checks in the bank,” she says. “And the car needs an oil change." He nods at each instruction. Then she pauses, thinks for a bit and adds, “Oh, and for your special treat, I have some underwear that needs to be hand-washed."

After her breakfast, she rises. It’s time for her to leave. She wants to be in the office at seven-thirty. While she brushes her teeth and makes a few last minute changes to her hair, he collects her briefcase and stands waiting for her by the door. She appears shortly after that. She looks him up and down.

Then, if it is any day but Wednesday, she walks to him, reaches under his robe and shirt, and gives his penis and testicles a firm squeeze. With her other hand, she reaches up and takes him behind the head. She pulls him down and forward. They kiss passionately. And, if it is any weekday but Wednesday, she releases him, saying, "Have a good day, babe," and goes out to her car.

Our spy at the window would be a bit startled by this, but she'd be truly amazed if it is Wednesday. On Wednesdays, things are a little different. On Wednesdays, she waits at the door. She taps her font once. He drops instantly to his knees, leans forward to grovel before her and put his head on the top of her shoe.

They wait for a long moment. Finally, she raises the toe of her shoe. He rolls back up to his knees, but remains kneeling. She pets his head and says, “Good boy.” He stays on the floor, with his eyes down and not looking at her until she leaves.

When he hears her car door close, he stands and begins his day.

Ivy drives to work. She is an important professor of history and women's studies at a certain University that we won't name. She is tenure track and on the way up. She also makes a surprisingly large sum of money. That's not true for most academics. But Ivy is a star in her profession. Thus, she is one of the small, but real group of professors who has a six-figure income. She has also inherited money from her grandmother. Thus, she is the only real breadwinner in the family. Bobbi is very much dependent on her economically and has been for years.

lvy spends the clay teaching classes and working on her next book, a path-breaking new study of how upper-middle class women reshaped the luxury cruise industry in the early twentieth century. The role of female consumers during the period is tragically unexplored, and her book will almost certainly be regarded as a classic in the field.

Bobbi likewise has a busy day. As soon as she is out of the house, he quickly fixes himself a light breakfast and then gets to work. First, he washes the dishes and straightens up the kitchen, Then, he hurriedly does any outstanding housework that needs to be done. He likes to get that finished early in the day. He vacuums the front room, makes the bed, puts a load of laundry in the washer, and so on. All of this he does in his pajamas, still without a pair of pants.

Then, the “special treat.” He finds the underwear she mentioned. She has left them in a separate hamper in the bedroom. There are red panties, black panties, and white cotton panties. These he takes to the downstairs laundry sink and carefully, lovingly, washes them by hand.

When he is finished, he checks the time. It is only 10:00! Excellent. At last, he can dress. He slips on slacks and a shirt and then heads out to take care of his outside chores. He goes to the bank, as he has been instructed, and then visits the franchise oil change and lube job place by the library. A short time later, he does the grocery shopping and returns home. If it were Monday, Tuesday, or Friday, he would then go to work. He is a counter clerk at a little cafe and sandwich shop in the next suburb over, "The Wee Nook.” On those days he pulls a twelve-to-four shift, taking orders and making coffee for the chic suburban matrons of the area. He's very good at his job, and he's popular with the customers. For one thing, he’s boyish and handsome, and hid body is in great shape, and the customers frequently put quite respectable tips in the jar on the counter.

His boss, Ms. Lisa Grandview, has tried to promote him to manager three times, but each time he’s demurred. He does not want to be in any position that might give him authority. At first, Ms. Grandview had been quite perplexed, but then Ivy Ann had a chat with her, and everything was settled. “Of course,” Ms. Grandview had said. "It's so natural."

But today is Wednesday, so instead he goes to the gym. It is his duty to keep fit and trim for his wife. Three times a week he exercises briskly, and he is constantly on a diet. In fact, today he skips lunch entirely. He mustn't chunk up, he knows.

Finished, he showers. Now, if our spy had followed him to the gym, and even somehow managed to look into the men's showers, she would have been amazed again. She’d notice that each of Bobbi's nipples has been pierced and there is a small golden ring in each of them. As the soap covers his chest he winces in pain, but also feels them grow erect under his fingers. He gives himself a playful tweak on both.

Once done he rushes home. He prepares dinner. She usually allows him to decide on the menu. It is one of his little freedoms. So he turns to it. Tonight it will be something a little more elegant than usual. It is a little  tradition they have. They call it “the Wednesday Night Special.” Tonight it will be a small steak that he’s carefully prepared.

He also prepares the bedroom.

When everything is ready, he dresses in something nice. Sometimes, when they are being formal, it is a suit. Sometimes she prefers a costume. He has several. Her favorite is The Delivery Boy. Tonight, though, he has been told to go almost nude. He will wear a tight, spandex swimsuit and nothing else. He squeezes into them, his testicles and penis becoming a tight bulge beneath the cloth.

She arrives home. He hurries to the door to meet her. When she is in, he drops once more to the floor and touches her shoe. “Up," she says, slightly impatiently. He is quick to rise. "God," she says, "I'm tired. Long day."

He takes her things and follows her to the front room. She sits in the big chair and he brings her a drink. Then he puts on music and sits attentively on the sofa. She tells him about her day. “We have this really awful graduate student. He is older, and he has the fantastic idea that I should treat him with respect." He listens and is very careful to murmur soft agreements.

When she is ready for dinner, he serves her. If she is pleased with him, she nods, and he sits and eats.

"Very good,” she says finally. Then he pours her a glass of wine and she goes to the bedroom. He quickly takes care of the dishes. He already has an erection. It pushes painfully into the cloth of the spandex suit.

He waits until he hears her ring the bell beside her bed. He quickly enters the bedroom. She is standing at the end of the room. She wears black panties and an open cup corset, and on her feet arc stilettos. “Down,” she commands.

Once more he sinks to the ground. He places his forehead on the carpet.

“Crawl,” she commands. He slowly makes his way across the room, keeping his face to the floor. He reaches her feet. He kisses them.

“Who am I?” she demands.

He raises his lips from her toe. "You are my empress.”


"My mistress and my master."


"Forever, my Lady.”

She allows him to rise to his knees. “Use your teeth,” she says.

Tenderly, keeping his hands at his sides, he uses his teeth and lips to pull her black panties down her thighs. He is very, very careful.


His tongue darts into her vagina. He touches her clit once, then pulls away. He begins again, this time at the base of her vagina and moves slowly up its long length. Once more he comes to the clit. He stimulates it with long, lingering licks.

“Good boy,” she pats his head. “Now,” she sits on the bed, “come here.”

At her direction, he climbs into the bed and lies on his back. She quickly ties his hands to the bedposts with short lengths of blue cloth. Once he is helpless, she climbs atop him and leans down to his face. Her breasts are above him. "Pleasure me,” she commands.

Sometimes straining against the bonds, he lifts his head up to her nipples. His tongue touches them and licks desperately. “That’s a good boy,” she says. “Keep at it.”

She lowers herself down into his face. His lips and mouth close on first one nipple and then the other. Left, right, left, right!

She rears up again, scoots backwards on his body until she is sitting on his groin. She reaches forward and takes his small, man’s nipples between her fingers. “Your turn,” she says. With a gasp, he feels her fingers close on his nipples. There is a burst of pain as she touches the gold rings that pass through them. He whimpers. But it is pleasure rather than pain. He feels his nipples grow almost as hard as hers.

She shifts back further still. She is now astride his legs. She reaches forward and takes his penis in one hand and his testicles in the other. She holds them, not so hard that it hurts, but firmly enough that he knows she could hurt him if she wishes.

“Who am I?” she asks again.

“My lady and master," he replies.

“And what have you promised to do?”

“To love, honor and obey you.”


And then she repositions herself. She feeds his penis into her vagina. “Stay still!" she warns him. He obeys.

For a moment, they are still. Then, slowly, slowly, she rolls herself forward, taking him deeper and deeper within her. She rolls back, crushing his testicles with her buttocks. She rolls forward, and then she moves to first one side and then the other.

He moans.

"Still!" she commands again. He stays still, utterly passive.

Then she moves faster. And faster! She rolls forward and back! She moves from side to side! He moans in helpless delight!

Suddenly she rears her head back and roars! She has her orgasm! She is dominant and triumphant! She is his master! And her body explodes with the pleasure! And with conquest!

Then she tenses her vagina one last time. He feels her crush his manhood deep within her. And he comes! He feels himself explode upward into her! His mind vanishes in a great flash of pleasure! He is hers! He is utterly hers!

He is mindless. She rolls off him.

In time, she releases him. They sleep together in each others' arms.

Friday, May 10, 2019


[Note from Thomas Lavalle: The Internet  was in its infancy when I first stumbled, to my prurient delight, on femdom sites (long before the term “FLR). When I found something especially provocative, I would save it to file. Happily, a good many of these text captures have survived, though in most cases I can no longer trace them to their sources—e.g., a particular bulletin board, newsgroup, forum or social networking site. As an example, I am unable to document where I unearthed either of the two citations below, but I’ve decided to share them with the readers of this blog anyway. Both selections are unapologetic testaments—as I thought when I first read them—to a lifestyle of uncompromising female supremacy. Both “Lady E” and “Caligula” affirm their right and preference not only to own male slaves but to treat them as chattel. Interestingly, as you will discover, both extracts explore similar techniques for keeping household males strictly in their place and out of the way when not needed.]

LADY ‘E’—I was having a problem with my husband who is submissive to me. He is a good creature but at times he was just too attentive. There were times when I just wanted to relax and not have him at my feet always begging to do something for me. It wasn’t right to punish him for it because I trained him to always make my needs his priority. Even when I told him to sit and be quiet, it seemed that every time I got up to do something, he felt the need to jump. I got tired of telling him to sit.

I consulted an experienced domme friend, who told me just to “park him someplace.” It seemed cruel to do this to a creature that was trying to do so good. But I tried it anyway. I came home from work one night and he had dinner ready for me. We ate and I took a shower while he cleaned up. I really just wanted to sit back that evening and read, without having to be “Mistress.” When I came into my living room, there he was, sitting on the floor, waiting for me. It almost pissed me off! I decided this was the night I was going to do it!

I told him to get me the ball gag, blindfold, my locking cuffs and some chain. I also told him to use the bathroom. When he got back, he was instructed to remove his clothes. I had placed a kitchen chair at a wall opposite where I was going to sit in the room. I put a pillow on the chair to make sure it was comfortable and turned it to face the wall. He was instructed to sit and put his arms behind him. Then I locked his wrists and ankles in cuffs and used a length of chain to connect them. This arrangement, I thought, should allowed him to remain comfortable for a number of hours.

He was so quiet and cooperative that I almost felt sorry for wanting to store him away for the night. Almost, but not quite! I inserted the ball gag and then told him that he was “being parked for the night” until I needed him. As I placed the blindfold over his eyes I told him that I was not punishing him, but just putting him away like one puts a car in a garage when they don’t need it.

He remained quiet and still for a very long time, only stirring occasionally. After about an hour I took out the ball gag for a minute and then released him to check and see if he was all right and allow him to stretch a bit. Then I “parked” him again.

I had such a pleasant evening that night! So much time of quiet all to myself without the responsibility of giving orders. Later that night, when I released him to go to bed, he seemed much more relaxed as well.

Parking him has become a regular thing now. It seems too simple to work so well that I can hardly believe it. Needless to say, I am extremely thankful to my domme friend for this advice.


CALIGULA—I am a liberated woman. I am what I want to be and I am where I want to be at this time in my life. I would love to help other women to achieve what I have because I believe in the natural superiority of the female over the male; so to this end I will try and relate how I achieved and maintain control over my slave.

Most men have a very overblown ego. They learn this as little boys and they continue to exercise this silly posturing for most of their life until they meet a woman capable of deflating it, and eventually destroying it. To begin them on this journey a capable woman must systematically chip away at their self-esteem.

To begin this process; introduce him very early on to the concept of obedience to you. Most men can be subtly introduced to this by appealing to his ego and letting him think he is just doing his “man thing,” pleasing his lady. At this point, or very soon, you can introduce subtle punishment to him. At first just withhold sex, or perhaps don’t allow him to see you for some period of time. Using your own superior female wiles, you can soon begin to use physical discipline on him.

He will think it is a bedroom game that you are playing. He will learn the truth, too late. He should see very soon that you are serious about it. When you have established that disobedience will result in discipline, you have started him well on his way. No man can continue with his inflated male ego while being punished by a woman. As you introduce him to more and more regular sessions of physical punishment, you can begin to introduce him to some rules. Once you have done this, it is only a matter of time before you will have you a personal servant or slave—if you wish.

I personally suggest you continue his training until you have enslaved him. This is what I have done and I could not be happier. My slave is completely broken and is at this time completely subject to my will. Why wouldn’t I be happy? Why would every woman not do this? In addition to having a slave to serve you, he will submit to every torture and degrading situation you put him in. You have to continue to do this, too. It is the way you keep him broken. Need some pointers? Okay!

PUNISH OFTEN—You will find countless reasons. I spank my male every day. To keep his rear in shape, I like to put hand cream on it every day as well (keeps it soft). If you feel he is getting used to it, put a nice hot towel on his butt before you spank him. It increases the pain a lot. You will find all of this will increase you power over him, and you will find that you look forward to it and will enjoy the way it destroys his will power. Remember, you are not trying to teach him anything. You are simply trying to keep him down.

NEVER LET HIM ON THE FURNITURE—I keep one stool that is his. He knows where he goes when I am not using him.

NEVER LET HIM SPEAK—Work out a sign he can use if he wishes to say something. Then punish him for using it. Soon he will learn to not speak at all.

CONTROL HIS FUNCTIONS—Get him on a schedule and he will get used to it. Then you will not be disturbed by him needing things when you are using him. Also, it further degrades him to know he cannot even control this.

CONTROL HIS ACTIVITIES—There is no need for your slave to be entertained. When mine is serving me, if I see him glance at the TV, you guessed it—punishment! I use a “white sound” tape to block out all sound while I am watching TV. He must have his earphones on so that he doesn’t hear it. I doubt that he has seen or heard much TV or radio at all for the last few years.

DEFINE HIS POSTURE—Until he has been broken, require him to keep his head bowed and eyes lowered. In addition to degrading him, it is uncomfortable for him and enjoyable to see. When you are punishing him, never allow him to move in any way. I prefer him to remain limp, draped over whatever I have placed him over. When I first began his training, he would become limp after I made him weak by continuing his punishment. Now he knows that he must be that way at all times. I enjoy the way it looks and it makes him feel more useless.

BE STRICT—Remember that you are not here to please him, and you are not trying to teach him anything. You are breaking him down mentally and emotionally. Never allow him to deviate even a small amount from your rules. Punish, punish, punish!!!

ENJOY YOURSELF—I have talked to some ladies who begin to feel sorry for their slaves. Big mistake! If you do this, he will take advantage of it and in time will become a problem. Remind him often of his inferior place in life. Laugh at him, belittle him, let him know his suffering is enjoyable to you. If you have a girlfriend who is agreeable, do these things in front of her. This really destroys their self--image.

REMEMBER—This is permanent and your control should only grow as time passes. My slave will never again have any control over his life, nor will he ever go a day without being tortured. If you came to my house you would see a broken man, cowering before his Mistress. I intend to destroy him even more. He really is quite pathetic and I love it!!!


Monday, April 1, 2019


(Note from Tom Lavalle: ‘Spouseclub’ and ‘Spousechat’ were created by Bill Higgins, a real estate entrepreneur who became a househusband after marrying the CEO of a much larger real estate firm (Barbara Corcoran of the Corcoran Group in New York City). Higgins’ original message board was intended as a networking site for other men wed to high-powered executives. Within a few months, however, the site seems to have been populated mainly by passionate advocates for “matriarchal marriages” (i.e., what are now commonly called wife-led marriages and female-led relationships), with husbands playing enthusiastically supportive roles. The message board was deactivated in 2003, and the only archives currently available are some excerpts saved by Mark Remond and republished in several installments on  his Wife Worship blog, starting here-- from which these samples are taken.)


Although I am currently employed in a reasonably senior job, my girlfriend (who also reads this board) is keen for me to give it up, move in with her. Give up work and dedicate myself full time to her service. Whilst I am happy to do this holding as I do a totally subordinate role in our relationship, I am concerned as my girlfriend has a 16-year-old daughter from a previous relationship and I worry as to what effect this might have on her daughter. Although her daughter is aware that I am submissive to her mother, I am not sure she appreciates the extent of my submission. This does concern me, though Ms Angela insists that it’s no problem and her daughter understands the nature of our relationship and as a teenager is happy with the idea of being able to hand over her chores to me.

It sounds like you - oops, I mean Ms Angela - has it well in control. Listen to Ms Angela; obey Ms Angela; learn to please Ms Angela... therein lies wisdom. I am learning to say “Yes, My Goddess”

What are the complications, Mr. Angela? Do as you are told. Women have a high sense of morals. Nothing unseemly will happen and you will forward the cause of Matriarchal Households and give a very positive image to a young teenage woman who may find a boy like “dear ole step-dad.”

Well yes, but I suspect that knowing myself and Ms Angela and her daughter that I will end up as servile to both of them, I guess it’s that I am concerned about. Perhaps I should just accept it as my role and be grateful.

I think you should simply accept your role. Yes, you may be servile to both, but you will be guided in it by Ms. Angela. You may be helping form a mindset in the young teenager. It seems proper to me that you would take a servile role to both of them. Good luck. Enjoy your new role! Like so many modern men, you are breaking new ground in a very positive way.

Thanks for your advice. I have spoken to Ms Angela about this and my feelings. She too feels that it is quite natural that I be servile to them both. She has said that it would make her happy to see me call her daughter miss and her Ma’am. She also likes the idea of her daughter assuming some of Ms Angela’s supervisory duties when she is not there. Whilst I am comfortable to an extent, I am still not sure I am ready to be scolded and chastised by someone young enough to be my daughter.

You say you feel it is not comfortable to surrender to your girlfriend’s daughter. I say you will surrender not to her daughter foremost, but to your Lady’s wish (which is to obey her daughter too). From this point on, you cannot make any excuses.

Yes, I am sure you are right and that’s what I intend to do. Part of me I think is still adjusting to the new dynamics. It will be an adjustment for me to submit to this young lady but one I am happy, willing and eager to make. In some ways when I reflect on it I find the idea of submitting to my Mistress’s daughter really quite pleasing, reinforcing as it does my true place in the domestic pecking order.

Matriarchy does not have to be a “power” trip in male terms. It is recognition of the female as head of the family, as head of that household, and the person on whom all final decisions rest. There is no hatred for males in such a relationship. The males may be submissive, but it does not have to be a sadistic treatment for “lowly males.” It is also a focus on females in the family. It is the opportunity to give female children priority over their brothers. It may also represent the teaching of domestic skills to the boy children so that they can face the new society. I do believe matriarchy is best addressed when the man takes his wife’s name in marriage. I also endorse the practice of the man becoming Mr. (Her first name) (Her last name). In this way, they can tell society that they are a female-centered household. It is the time of women now. So many of us in this forum have said as much. Long Live The Matriarchy!

I just met a college senior. His girlfriend graduated this past May and is already in the work force at a job that is paying $90,000 a year. That is where she started. He knows he will never be able to match that after his graduation. He has realized that her career will dictate where they live. He may be the one who is at home when they have children. He is having to consider things that men ten years ago did not have to think about.

I am a matriarchist, will continue to be one, and will train my husband, sons, and daughters in the ways of matriarchy. I am not even against the “kinkier” side of relationships, but, the important issues here seem to be with men coping with a secondary status in the workplace, home, and family. I, for one, am happy to see the changes.

My wife and I reversed roles a little over three years ago when she got a big promotion. She was already making more money than I was and was the major decision-maker. We no longer needed my salary and she decided she wanted me to become a full-time househusband. I wasn’t really sure about doing that but she insisted I give it a try. After one year if I didn’t like it, she said, I could go back to work.

She had to teach me how to cook a wider variety of meals, how to iron her clothes and a few other things but I was a quick learner. It only took me a few months to realize how much I enjoyed just being her househusband. I was able to keep the house cleaner than it had ever been, keep her clothes clean and pressed, have her meals ready on time, run her errands and a host of other duties and still had time for a round of golf now and then.

After the first year we sat down and discussed the situation. I wanted to continue as a househusband and not go back to work. She agreed but with some conditions. I would have to recognize her as head of the house and with the final say in all areas of our relationship. I was to consider it my primary responsibility to support her and her career in whatever way I could and that she wanted. And since she was making all the money, I would be put on an allowance and expected to live within it.

I had no problem agreeing with this. The last two years have been great. It is my opinion men are much better suited to keeping house. And believe me, submitting to your wife, honoring and obeying her is the way to go.

How far did you go in the role reversal? Is she the boss in all areas? In honoring your wife as head of the household, did you take her last name to acknowledge her leadership? Do you identify her as head of the household on tax forms, etc.? In what ways do you obey your wife? How does her family feel about her being the head of your household? How does your family feel? If you have children, will you raise them to know that the wife is the boss in your household?

I told my boyfriend that I was taking the best  job offer after graduation because it made the most economic sense. I told him he should follow me, spend some time as my househusband to help me get settled and establish his role in our relationship, and to give him the freedom of finding the right job if he really wants to work in the outside world during our marriage. He caved in within minutes. He needs my direction in his life. He then served me some tea and fruit, ending the evening’s discussion with some Empress Wu treatment that was out of this world. I think we women have to be more determined and make our own decisions. The men will follow; they have to follow.
Do you have any words of advice for my future husband? He needs to know that he is not alone. This is not a fantasy. As he gets more comfortable being submissive and subordinate to me, I hope he never loses what has made him special. I do not want a doormat. I want a man who gladly takes women’s rule seriously.

We want to have children. I will want them to know in very real ways that Mommy Knows Best. I want my children (male and female) to know that I head the household. I also want all of us to continue to grow. If my husband does nothing but obey me, he will be very boring very soon.

I have decided to throw a dinner party for the one female professor (Feminist Studies) who has given me the most encouragement. My boyfriend will prepare and serve the meal. I do not intend on humiliating him in front of my teacher. However, I do want him to get experience in serving since he will be doing a lot of this to foster and nurture my career. Of course, I will praise him for his abilities if he provides excellent service. I can prove that I am in charge without making him be less of a man. I think my professor might truly enjoy being served by a nice, young college guy.

I am having the time of my life at this very moment that I write to you. While I am at the computer, my boyfriend is underneath the desk. He is giving me a foot massage and some oral sex. If I do not make sense at some moment in the email, you will understand why.

I am a Woman of Enlightenment. I know what I want and i know I will get what I want. Men have expected women to give up their names so easily and for so long. Even if a couple will take the man’s name, a man should have the feeling of being called by his wife’s first and last name as the family name. I would hope that this would create even more respect for his wife. I think junior and senior high school aged boys should be required to write the name of their girlfriends like Ms. and Mr. Lauren Tyler.

I was at lunch today with five other women who will be getting married within the next year and a half. Three are keeping their names in marriage. Two are taking the name of their husband. I asked each to ask their boyfriend how he would feel taking her name in marriage. My point is that he may have a greater respect for her and her role in the family if he realizes what she is giving up. I think I am going to make it a mission of mine to encourage young women to ask that questions of their future spouses. I am for freedom for everyone. I just want the matriarchal to stand shamelessly with the patriarchal. I like the idea that young man had about having a matriarchal street where children could be raised to appreciate woman’s leadership.

Men need our guidance and direction. They need some sensitivity training. In the family living classes at high schools, there should always be one couple where the woman is the breadwinner and the man is the househusband who took her name. What examples this could bring to any classroom discussion. At the present time, I am not sure that men are not scared of their shadows. I am a Woman on a Mission with a very well trained boyfriend. I am addressing this to all you couples, men and women out there. You can help me with the training of my boyfriend and I can help you get even deeper into your respectful support of Women.

I have a daughter that is 15 and have raised her since she was 2 as a single mom. I can tell you that I am raising my daughter to be a strict wife someday in her own way. Yes I will show her a man caring for me in ways as, cleaning the house, doing the laundry, shopping and yes even polishing my toenails.  This just shows the devotion and love a woman, mother of his children (in some cases) and wife deserve. The other aspects of being a dominant wife of course will come in time and as my daughter matures and finds her path in life then she will choose those characteristics.

My two daughters, Sheila now 17, and Diana now 13, and my son Francis now 15, have taken female superiority for granted, because matriarchy is the basis on which my family has always been run. Like my husband, all three of the children are subject to very strict discipline. I aim to bring up the two girls to become dominant women, but nobody can be a good disciplinarian without having undergone strict discipline themselves, so I am as strict with them as with the boy.  Francis has been trained to look after his own and his two sisters’ clothes and now does most of the washing, ironing and mending of them under Sheila’s supervision. At age 13, a girl who has been properly brought up is capable of being left in charge of a well disciplined boy. Besides, her pubescent period is one in which her ideas about the relationship between the sexes get established. Accordingly, when Sheila turned 13, I started to leave Francis in her charge when I had occasion to go out without them. When she turned 15, I gave her the authority to spank him, which she has exercised very deftly and responsibly. Sheila will soon be going away to university, so now that Diana is 13 I am starting to leave Francis sometimes in her charge, so that she can take over Sheila’s responsibilities for him. When she is 15, she will, like her sister, be given the privilege of spanking him, and he will feel this subjection all the more because he will then be 17, and therefore it will be a younger sister punishing him.

I have not thought it wise to try to conceal from the children that their daddy is fully under my control, just as they are, and is liable to punishment in the same manner as them. Otherwise, when they happened to find out, they would have imagined it was some sort of wicked secret. As it is, they hear me give him orders, see him submissively obey, and sometimes see him getting a tanning, and they take it all as a matter of course. This helps to establish in their minds the principle of a wife/mother being the absolute ruler of her household with husband as well as children subject to her authority and in her absolute power.

Sheila must have been about six when my chastisement of her father first came to her notice. I simply told her that daddy had been naughty and was being punished. Punishment for naughtiness was a familiar principle to her, so she just took the explanation as natural and reasonable. In these and other ways I have done my best to bring the children up imbued with the notions of female supremacy and a woman’s absolute rule over her family.

Three cheers for Gynocrat! I’m glad I’m not the only female who realises how important initial training is to establish the fact of female supremacy in both boys and girls.

My cousin Robert was raised to accept and respect female supremacy and eventually came to prefer his submissive role, which made him ideally suited for marriage to a strong-minded, dominant woman, and this is just what occurred when the time came. He actually married an old childhood friend, Pauline, who knows exactly how to treat him, and makes sure he remains thoroughly under her control. My aunt gave Pauline a present on her wedding-day---her wooden spoon, all tied up in pink ribbon, and I happen to know that it is still used just the same as before.

Thursday, February 28, 2019


(Note from Thomas Lavalle: One of my regular readers, and a frequent commenter to the blog, who goes by the name of "freddie," has been emailing me about his own female-led family. His lifestyle differs in some ways from other matriarchal families and clans chronicled here, but shares with them a pervasive aura of what Elise Sutton calls Loving Female Authority. As a result, freddie assures me, both he and his son, "S," feel totally loved and protected in their subordinate and devoted roles in this all-embracing family "femocracy." "Freddie" has kindly agreed to share with the readers of this blog a few of his thoughts and feelings. I hope to offer additional postings from him going forward.)

First, I should make clear that I have been given permission to write about our family’s experience of being a Female Led Family (a lifestyle we hope and expect will one day be accepted by all of society), but I am forbidden from giving names, except my own, of course. My wife will be referred to here as “HoF” (Head of Family), our daughters as “D1” and “D2,” and our son as “S.” When I am addressed as other than “Freddie” (I am never called “father/dad/daddy” by anyone, as this would suggest a role and a status I simply do not have), it is usually “boi,” which I like.

Let me also say a little bit about the early stages of our family and how it developed. HoF and I met at university. She was a star student and I was just okay. From the beginning it was clear that both of us shared a world view on the relationship between females and males, and on the clear superiority of the former over the latter. She decided to take me as her helpmeet. For reasons, which need not be detailed here, she married me. Put simply, she needed a male to give her children, and she decided it should be me. I was (and am) deeply honored. So, during the early years, I was summoned to her bed each night. When I had done my duty, I was sent to my own room and bed. She had three children (S, D1and D2) and decided that was enough. Since then, I am no longer permitted to visit her bed.

Our sleeping arrangements are straightforward. HoF, D1 and D2 each have their own rooms, which S and I are not allowed to enter unless they require us to do something for them. He and I share the fourth bedroom. We have a bunk bed, and one week I sleep on the top and the next, he does. We are put to bed at the same time. It is, of course, when the female in charge at the time decides and is ALWAYS well before their bedtime.

We all have our own tasks around the house. HoH does all the paperwork, business details and so on, as well as having the final say in all matters. I am responsible for meals (HoH decides what we have, of course; I simply prepare it). S and I share clearing the table, stacking the dishwasher and washing pans, etc. I do most of the other housework, and am also responsible for washing clothes, but the three children iron their own clothes, and D1 and D2 are responsible for cleaning their own rooms. S and I have to make sure that ours is kept immaculate. One of the females inspects it without giving notice. Woe betide us if there is anything out of place!

I promised Mr. Lavalle to write about an incident when corner time was used to punish us (well, on this occasion, me). Whilst HoF was busy doing her business, the four of us were told to play a game until bedtime (mine and S’). We were playing a card game called Snap. Basically, each player has the same number of cards to start with and puts the top one from her/his pile on a central pile. If two cards are the same, you have to shout “Snap” and quickly put your hand on the central pile. You then take all those cards and make your pack bigger, until one player has all the cards.

We were having a great (though a bit noisy, according to HoF!) time. Then the Bad Moment came. Two cards, placed atop the central pile one after another, were the same. I rushed to put my hand on the pile. So did D2. She claimed that she won, and I thought that I did. D1 was angry with me for “cheating,” she said.

That was when I made my Big Mistake.

I argued! D1 was beyond angry and told me to strip to my underpants and go to my corner. (S and I each have a specific corner we must go to when we are being punished.) Stupidly, I tried to plead against her punishment. What effect did that have? To make her even angrier, of course. D1 told me that now I had to strip completely before going to my corner. Defeated, I did as I was told this time. I stood there with my back to the room and my hands on my head, ashamed at my behavior, until I was told to come out of the corner.

No, I wasn’t being let off. I was sent immediately to bed. It was not even 7 o’clock. But a valuable lesson had been reinforced. In our family, males are never permitted to argue with the governing females.