Saturday, January 9, 2016


(Note from Tom Lavalle: Over many years of ’net surfing, I’ve squirreled away scads of provocative femdom writings and postings. Among my favorites are some brief entries by a woman signing herself Julie Wilson or “Boss Julie.” She was apparently connected with a Chicago-based female supremacist organization called Christian Home. Alas, a current Google search turns up nothing more, indeed, nothing at all. I’ve decided to share these fragmentary treasures (in two installments) with readers of this blog, and will, of course, happily remove them if contacted by the much-missed“Boss Jule,” or, even more happily, publish more at her direction.)

Foot Worship

A man with a submissive personality will already have an inclination toward foot worship, and a woman can start him in at once. Some men may not be ready for it, however. One way for a woman to tell if a man is ready is to have him massage her feet. If he shows disdain for them, then it will be necessary to lead him to foot worship in stages. This is done by training him with other fetishes first. Besides the female foot, all other major fetishes are articles of women’s clothing. These items tend to be clustered from the waist down. There is a
reason for this. As women’s power has increased, the lower parts of women’s bodies have received more attention from men. The twentieth century has witnessed a progressive increase in the power of women and a corresponding decline in the power of men; as a consequence, more attention is being paid to women’s legs and feet. A woman can tease her man by putting on and taking off the stockings, crossing and uncrossing her legs, letting her shoe dangle and stopping to straighten her seams from time to time. And a woman’s feet become more enticing when sheathed in sheer nylon.

The submissive man in particular sees the high heel as an authority symbol; he is more inclined to obey a woman who wears them than one who doesn’t. The shoes that work best for this are ones with slender (“stiletto” or “spike”) heels that are relatively high—say three inches or more, although two and three-quarter inches can be good enough for occasions that call for more formal dress. If you are considerate enough to wear your stiletto heels for him, then he should be grateful enough to massage your feet for you when you ask him to, and you can tell him so. You can rub his chest with your stockinged feet and then go on to get him to kiss your feet. Always keep in mind that the goal is to bring him to the point that he will worship your feet, or your feet and shoes.

Household Hints

It is amazing how little most men know about basic cleanliness around the house. But it is important for him to do housework, as it involves doing something that directly benefits other members of the household and helps to undermine male selfishness.

Trying to get men to do housework is a frustration experienced by millions of women. Amanda says this about her ex-husband: “I could not seem to convey to him that his time spent golfing was in no way equivalent to the time I spent cleaning the house. I would tell him, ‘Hey, this is work,’ and he’d reply, ‘You think I don’t work up a sweat on the golf course?’ Then he’d ask if I wanted to learn golf. Since it was my choice not to, he seemed to feel that as long as I was in the house, I might as well scrub it.”

So what can be done if men resist doing housework because, deep down, they think it’s women’s work? A Mr. Goodman makes some proposals, but it’s not clear that they are very satisfactory. One of his proposed solutions is to hire a cleaning woman. This would get the house cleaned, but I’m still uncomfortable with it. The only reason that so many women are available to do housekeeping is because we women are discriminated against when it comes to better jobs. So if I hire a cleaning woman, I would be reinforcing the general pattern of sexual discrimination.

Mr. Goodman has another proposal. He suggests making a list of all the things that need to be done and then having your man choose which ones he will do. This approach has the advantage of using psychology to get the man over his fear of housework, but it still doesn’t accomplish what I want. I am the lady of the house; this is my home, and I ought to be in control. This means that I should be the one to decide what my husband will do when it comes to housework. Letting him choose from a list means that I no longer am in control. I consider this unacceptable.

What works for me, when I am dealing with my Billy, is to use psychology in a different way. Since the problem is that he unconsciously thinks of housework as “women’s work,” I get him into the proper frame of mind by dressing him in women’s clothes. It works! First I make him put on a pair of lace-trimmed nylon panties and a padded bra. It helps him to develop the proper attitude if he is aware of what he is wearing, so I always cinch the bra a little on the tight side. Then he has to wiggle into a tight girdle and hook up a pair of gartered stockings. These are followed by a white nylon slip and a colorful, feminine housedress. Finally he puts on a pair of high-heeled pumps, and he is ready for
me to lead him to where he will be working. Sometimes, if my women friends are dropping by, I might apply some lipstick and tie up his hair in a scarf.

Other women may complain that their men don’t do enough around the house, but I no longer have this problem. My Billy cooperates fully because he knows that I love him and that I would never make him do anything that was bad for him. Of course, most men are not very skilled at housework when they first try it, so you have to do a lot of supervising at first, but you will find that if you put him in a dress, he will learn much faster.

Housework Tasks for Hubby

1. Cook all meals and clean up afterwards.
2. Prepare a weekly menu and review it with your partner.
3. Do the shopping for the food, track food usage, and keep the kitchen stocked.
4. Clean the bathrooms (with brushes and cleanser, not your tongue).
5. Make the beds (including the pillows).
6. Do the laundry, iron, fold and put away.
7. Dust and vacuum and yes, do the windows, too.
8. Put out potpourris, candles, or oils with her favorite scents so that the house is always fragrant.
9. Feed, bathe, and groom the pets.
10. Take the children to school (or bring them to the bus stop).
11. Do home repairs within your capabilities.
12. Take the garbage pails to the curb on garbage nights.
13. Clean the pails after the garbage has been collected.
14. Package the recycling, wrap the newspapers and bring them to the curb on recycling days.
15. Prepare the monthly bills and payments for review and prepare all checks for the domme’s signature.

Yardwork :
16. Mow, edge, and trim the yard regularly.
17. Take care of the garden beds and trim the trees.
18. Make certain the lawn and flower beds are watered regularly.
19. Care for the pool and spa.
20. Keep the patio, drive, and garage swept and clean, including cobwebs.
21. Remove the leaves from the gutters.
(If any of these “yardwork” tasks are done by a lawn service, have the sub manage the relationship (e.g., payment, negotiations, appointment management, etc.)

Nightly Activities:
22. Bring late night snacks while his partner watches TV.
23. Give up the remote! LOL!
24. Go on the Internet and research the Dish schedule (or TV Guide) and print out items which are of interest to the domme.
25. Get on the Internet and read the papers and her magazines to create the equivalent of an executive clipping service... articles of interest with key points highlighted.
26. Take down her bed (including the pillows).
27. Sit on the toilet seat before she needs to go in (in the winter it gets kind of cold).
28. Take her cell phone from her bag and put it on the charger (and then put it back in her bag, turned on, in the morning).
29. Draw the blinds and shades (and open them in the morning).
30. Put toothpaste on her toothbrush.
31. Fill her glass with water.
32. Bring her slippers.
33. Brush her hair.
34. Lay out the clothes she selects and press as appropriate.
35. Light scented candles, and put them out after she is asleep.
36. MASSAGE her back until she falls asleep (every night).

In the Car:
37. Keep a pager or cell phone so you can be called to pick her up at a moment’s notice.
38. Ask her if she’d prefer to drive.
39. If not, drive her wherever she needs to go and wait for her to come out.
40. Arrive at the front of the building within 10 seconds of her first step outside the door, 5 if the weather is not good. Keep an umbrella handy and escort her to the car if it’s raining.
41. Keep her favorite magazines and CDs in the car.
42. Never, ever criticize her driving or suggest a “quicker way” (unless she requests it).
43. Wash the car regularly inside and out.
44. Preheat and de-ice the car on cold mornings.

Around the House:
45. Pee sitting down so that the toilet seat is never up and you don’t leave “droplets.”
46. Prepare her bath (and the kid’s baths, if appropriate) and run the water until it’s warm for her showers.
47. Paint her toenails.
48. Pick up her shoes from the front hallway and carry them to her closet, inspect them and polish them as need be (with real polish, not saliva).
49. Keep her favorite magazines, books and CD’s ready in her favorite sitting areas.
50. Answer the phone and make phone calls for her (such as ordering items she’s marked in a catalogue).

Spanking and Taking Control

A lot of men have fantasies about being spanked by a woman, and if your husband is one of them, you should be able to get him to agree to let you be the boss at all times and not just during your spanking sessions.

There are a couple problems with a man who wants to be spanked. One is that he will have a tendency to misbehave just to get you to spank him. This can get to be quite irritating, as you come home after a hard day at the office only to find that dinner will be late again. The way to deal with this problem is to make the spankings severe enough that he will not try to provoke you anywhere near as often. He will still have his need to be spanked, but the spankings will be few and far between.

The other problem is that he will probably lose interest in being spanked after a while. Sadomasochists who have a strong interest in spanking call this phenomenon “burnout.” Burnout can be illustrated with reference to the 19th-century author Leopold von Sacher-Masoch, the man from whose name is derived our word “masochism.”

Sacher-Masoch wrote the novel Venus in Furs, in which the protagonist makes a contract with a woman, obligating him to be her servant and authorizing her to use corporal punishment to discipline him. This arrangement worked fine in the novel, and he subsequently married a woman with whom he was able to make a similar agreement. But it didn’t last. Over time, Sacher-Masoch lost interest in being dominated by his wife, and one day, when she entered his study swinging her whip as he was working at his desk, he simply threw her out of the room. Finally, he left his wife and devoted himself to helping to bring literacy to rural villages.

The phenomenon of burnout shows that a man’s interest in corporal punishment is not a sufficient basis for a long-term relationship in which the woman is boss. It can be the starting-point—and a very good starting-point—but the woman will have to find other grounds for her dominance. In the long run, the best motives are his desire for her approval and his desire for moral betterment. This is where the woman who wants to be in command should concentrate her attention. But whatever means you decide to employ and whatever goals you adopt for your relationship, always remember: You can do it—he’s only a man!

Female Led Families

Female supremacists can have homes in which it is obvious to the children that their mother is the boss. The father can set an example for his sons through his obedience to the lady of the house. This is in fact the most important thing a man can do for his sons—to give them this example of obedience to his wife. Then the children can grow up expecting to have the same kind of marriage as adults.

Femdom Paradigms: Mistress-Slave vs. Parent-Child

In the parent-child paradigm, the woman justifies her domination of the man in terms of a concern for his welfare. She points out that he needs a pretty boss; that it’s for his own good, while a mistress will express indifference to the man’s well-being, or even pleasure in his suffering.

It seems to me pretty obvious that the mistress-slave relation is pure sadomasochism, while the Christian Home “parent-child” paradigm is something different from that. The mistress-slave paradigm will always be limited primarily to “sessions”—short periods of scripted dominance and submission that begin on cue and end on cue.

Things are quite different in the parent-child framework. Here the concern is with developing activities which will make the man more obedient. Such activities do not necessarily provide him with sexual release; in fact, they often do just the opposite. One example of this is teasing, which involves getting the man sexually aroused and then denying him any release. A mistress-slave session can also involve teasing, but there its function is to get the man stimulated as a prelude to sexual release. In the parent-child paradigm, teasing is designed to make the man emotionally dependent on the woman who is training him. So it does not lead to immediate release.


A reader comments: “I completely agree with Christian Home‘s perspective: female domination in a matriarchal relationship doesn’t end up with sexual satisfaction, but it is intended as an infallible way to increase intimacy between the wife and the husband by increasing a man’s submission and obedience to his wife.

(Continued in Part Two…)


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